Blacky and the Storm

Thunder boomed in the dark grey sky and rain started to pour.  The guinea pigs of Sunny Zoo quickly rushed for cover and snuggled into their hutches.

All except Blacky.  He had been fast asleep under a tree in the garden when the storm clouds arrived and hadn’t noticed; once Blacky fell asleep, you could fire a cannon next to his ear and not wake him up.
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The rapidly darkening sky was suddenly lit up by a jagged, twisted bolt of lightning.  Then came the ominous rumble of thunder again.  CRACK-BANG!  A massive bolt of lightning erupted from the heavens and struck the very tree Blacky was sleeping under, electrifying the rainwater dripping from its branches. The whole tree was lit up with a glowing, electric blue colour.

Blacky easily slept through all of this.  High up, directly above Blacky’s head, was a leaf.  The leaf was heavy with rainwater.  That would have been all right, except the rainwater was threatening to tip all over Blacky’s head.  And it was glowing blue and sparkling. 

Slowly the leaf started to tilt….  A single droplet, no more than a few millilitres, pulsing with an unnatural luminance, fell from the very tip of the leaf.  By some horrible twist of fate, no branch or leaf happened to be in its way and that droplet fell like destiny towards Blacky’s forehead.  

It hit him.

The result was instantaneous!  Blacky vaulted into the air, wriggling with all claws stretched out. His hairs were standing on end, and miniature bolts of electricity were erupting from his fur and defusing into the ground.  “R-r-reeet! R-REEET!” he stuttered, still hovering about a foot in the air and glowing blue.

Then suddenly the light faded.  As if he had been hit in the head with an invisible mallet, Blacky dropped back on the ground like a sack of potatoes.
 
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The storm was over, and the sun had come out when Blacky finally awoke. He had a queer sensation in his head, like the feeling he got whenever he actually tried to think (a very rare occurrence).  He got up unsteadily and automatically plodded over to a fallen leaf on the ground to eat it.

But when he opened his mouth to take a bite, mysterious words spilled out!  “This leaf is a member of the scientific genus Acer, better known to common individuals as the maple. Leaves, like the one I am about to subject to my digestive system’s food-processing acids, are extensions of the tree that help the tree gain nutrients via photosynthesis, a procedure that turns the ultraviolet rays of sunlight into sugar using specialised light-sensitive cells.”

As if nothing had happened, Blacky gulped down the leaf, then walked over to Cutie the guinea pig Alpha to ask whether any succulent leaves might have snapped off during the storm, so that he could eat it. “Greetings, fellow member of the kingdom Animalia, phylum Chordata, class Mammalia, order Rodentia, family Cavidae, genus Cavia and species Porcellius. I would like to raise a query with regards to whether any leaves of the plant type Crassulaceae have become detached from their meristem points due to the recent violent weather patterns. I am in need of additional nourishment for my digestive system.”

“Umm, Blacky?” Cutie sounded confused. “Are you all right?”

“Do you propose the question to me as an inquiry about my physical health or mental status?” responded Blacky.

“Go and lie down under the succulent bush and you’ll feel better when you wake up,” suggested Cutie.

“I am in prime condition medically and I have no wish to enter a state of relaxed muscle condition and lessened reactions to environmental stimuli.” said Blacky.

“Um, sure, what you said,” said Cutie, feeling in need of a lie-down himself.

Blacky plodded off to play with the triplets, Brownie, Chocolate and Caramel.  When he found them digging in a corner of the lawn he asked, “I wish to join you three fellow members of the species Cavius Porcellius in a state of frolicking in which all immature animals engage in.”

“Bless you!” exclaimed the triplets together.

“I did not sneeze,” Blacky said in surprise. “The definition of sternutation, to use the proper terminology, is a semi-autonomous contraction of the muscles in the nasal cavity which releases air in an explosive burst. I am certain I did not do this.”

“Poor Blacky, your cold sounds really bad!” said Brownie sympathetically. “Go see Spotty for some medicine.”

Blacky was affronted, “I do not require medication that will lessen my mental activity by dampening my brain’s connection with its neurons.”

“Oh, bless you again,” said Caramel.

Blacky tottered off.  For a while he was content with reciting various trigonometric equations to himself at top speed, but then he got bored.  He looked up at the sky. “Hmmm, I wonder exactly how many spheres of self-combusting hydrogen there are out there…” he thought, and started to manipulate rapid quantum astronomy calculations in his head.

By nightfall he had derived a complex multi-tiered equation requiring not only Greek but also Arabic symbols that Blacky carefully tested by arranging probability sets using pebbles and sticks.  Only then did he allow himself to be hustled off into his hutch by the “hominid members of the genus Homo and of the species Sapien closely related to chimpanzees which share nearly 95% of their deoxyribonucleic acid codes”.
 
To be continued~~~
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